I'm up late.

The puppies were whining and Kanga couldn't sleep so therefore she wouldn't let me sleep. And after seeing what the problem was, (they had dumped over their food and were lonely) everyone fell back asleep but me. sigh

We have mass at 9 am. And I'm stressing over what to wear. I hate to shop and spend money on me. I think many moms are that way. So, I sat here on the computer and read blogs to maybe drum and idea into my head or get sleepy. Whichever comes first. It was upon reading stuff on the web that my midlife crisis stepped in again. Oh, go away bad thoughts! Negative feelings. FLEE! Be Gone! But there are here, nipping at my heels. I'm tried of the "same". And by the same, I mean the "same" excuses for not changing what I hate about my life.

I think we all have been there.

We say we will run.

We will lose weight.

I will cook more.

I will read more.

Whatever it is that we see we want our lives to be, but we don't get there, whatever that is. That's what I'm doing tonight.

I need to sleep instead of beating myself up, but I can't.

So, I turn to my blog to pour out the thoughts and yes, I'll hit publish now, but come back in the morning and delete.