I’ve put together a few thoughts to help make your Photographic Expeirence more enjoyable. I will probably add to this as time (and weddings) go by. You live and learn by expeirence, so this may by a good page to book mark and come back and revisit and your wedding moves closer. WARNING: I’m pretty random in what I discuss. Sort of all over the place, if you will. But it’s good. Good reading. Good food for thought for those that are engaged.
Be yourself.
Yes, it’s important to take a shower, do your makeup, clean up and look good, but even more important than that is BE YOURSELF. Don’t worry about photographs. That’s my job. When we take the formal portraits, I’ll have you look at the camera, positioning you in a flattering pose, but the rest of the time? WHO CARES? Enjoy your self, enjoy your time with family and friends. Natural photographs, or candids, are really better when the subject is NOT camera aware. So ignore me. I won’t get my feelings hurt.
Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Okay, so we are still tying bows on the programs and the weddings today. Big Deal. We’ve got 1/2 the day to sit around and sip mimosas and visit like we did back in college! Hand those babies to your bridesmaids and we can do it! So much of the planning can’t be done until the last minute. If it’s last minute and your “to do” list is still crazy, hand that puppy to someone to help! Some of the best times at a wedding are getting together and doing stuff together. One way or another, you will get married.
Stupid Church Rules.
Many churches restrict where I can be during the ceremony. I hate it, but it’s a rule sometimes to stay at the back behind the guests. Shoot, one church only allowed me one frame. One snap, during the creremony and that had to be taken through a crack in the door. Yep. Not kidding. Now, if this is your home church you have chosen for your ceremony site, and you’ve attended sunday school there forever, I get it. It’s important. I’ll abide by the rules and not get us in trouble. BUT, if you are shopping for a church to have one of the most important days of your life in, why not check the rules before setting the date? It’s lovely to have access to move around during the ceremony and MOST important, photograph your faces when you commit your lives to each other. I love the emotional shots like that!
Tux or Suit?
This is just my opinion, but my opinion comes with YEARS of photographing 100′s of weddings in sorry fitting tuxes. Now there are many weddings were a tux is a must. If you are planning a formal affair, by all means, go get those guys fitted for tuxes! But please, please, please, when you go to pick up that tux, TRY IT ON ONE MORE TIME. There’s so many times things aren’t right and just plain horrible. Check those bags for hankies, ties, vests, etc. And make sure you have dark socks! Unless hairy ankles are your thing. Oh, and if those tux pants are causing a wedgie and 2 inches 2 short, I can crop some, but NOT EVERY SHOT. Me personally? I love the idea of same colored suits. The flowers and ties and shirts can unite the entire group and they photograph beautifully. BECAUSE THEY FIT. I will add that nothing beats a well fitting tux on your hot man. NOTHING. And I love the idea of suspenders with a tux or suit because every guy gets hot at a party and takes his coat off. The suspenders photograph great and help make them NOT look like the wait staff.
Putting on the garter
Yes, it’s a job. Usually devoted to your sister, cousin or important friend. Most people have never put one on and most brides today, choose two. One to keep, one to wear. Many times they are blue. I’m always asked which leg or if they have to wear it. Tradition shows it goes on the right leg. And below I’ve included a really good article on garters at weddings. My photo suggestion is enjoy this moment! One of the benefits of hiring a documentary photographer, they are good at catching REAL moments. So, no worries, I’ll capture this. But try and remember this is a moment or connection between the bride and one other, so think about each other and your relationship and just go with the flow.
Here’s a good article about garters, in case you require further reading.
Flowers.
I’m highly trained in the area of pinning on flowers. I usually do it every wedding. But they have to be there to pin on. So, please make sure that your florist and photography timeline are on the same page. I’ll shoot formals without them, but they sure are prettier with them.
Reception flow.
At your reception, make sure there is ONE person who knows your wishes for how the evening is going to flow. And this person can speak with your coordinator, DJ, band leader, etc. to keep the evening flowing. This can be the key to a GREAT party! You need to enjoy the night and each other and let someone else worry about the details. Cake cutting, first dance, champagne toasts, all these things need a timeline and they need to be in charge of keeping your party flowing. The last thing you want to do, is run the show yourself. Which brings me to your first dance.
First Dance
A time for romance! A time to stare deeply into each other’s eyes and fall in love all over again! In FRONT OF ALL YOUR GUESTS! Yes. They can be a bit unnerving. So, maybe you should take dance lessons? Maybe not? Whatever you do, do it together and be on the same page. And yes, stare into each other’s eyes and talk about your wedding, your love, your dog. Anything endearing, but NOT about the groceries or what you have to do immediately when you get back from your honeymoon. Laugh a lot! And try not to step on each other’s toes.
The toasts.
This is an important time at the reception. Usually people get funny and emotional when speaking about the bride and groom and I love emotion, so I’m keen to get everyone’s faces. It helps if the key people involved stand close to one another. Please. And it’s a good idea to have a mike so guests can hear you. Speak into that mike. The DJ or band leader will be able to help you here. And most of all, if reading from a piece of paper, please look up and at the couple once in a while. Speak from the heart. Try and share something very personal, instead of “Jane and I are such good friends. We’ve known each other a long time.” Instead try, “oh, gosh Jane! Remember when we dressed up as nerds in Mrs. Smith’s 5th grade class and danced to Bodyrockers? We thought we were so cool!” It helps the guests identify you and helps “break the ice”. It’s okay to ramble a bit, as long as your funny. And for Pete’s Sake, please end your toast with something along the lines of “so cheers! To the bride and groom!” So, everyone knows you are finished and not just catching your breath for round 2.
Sleep.
The entire wedding weekend is full of amazing times to catch up with family and friends, however, it’s EXHAUSTING as well. Make sure you schedule time to rest so you look your absolutely best. Sure makeup artists can do WONDERS, however, give them a good canvas to create with. Sleep is important. It’s probably not a good idea to party at your rehearsal dinner like a college freshman at a beer bust. Um…no.
Food.
You will be asked all day long, “did you eat anything? You need to eat.” Yes, you do. Duh? No brainer. My brides aren’t stupid. But even better, why don’t you wear a pin that states “if you ask me about food today, you owe me a buck”. It’s a great way to get some cash for your honeymoon.
Smile.
I know. How stupid to mention that, but many of us don’t smile much. I think it’s because we are such thinking human creations. We think. And hard. But my goal for us working together is that you always feel relaxed and beautiful. There are so many beautiful moments in your day. I can’t wait to photograph them!
by Kristin
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